Emotion
by SassyAngel05
Summary: Set after Island of the Haunted.Short little thoughts for each one of the characters about life and feelings. Ethan talks. LAST ONE! Thank you so much for all the kind reviews. I appreciate it.
1. Default Chapter

Author: Vona  
Title: All Relative  
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, never will.  
Rating: G  
Summary: Lyle considers life. A series of poems for each member of the  
intricate workings of The Centre.  
Feedback: Love it. Always have!  
  
All Relative  
  
Psychosis.  
Insanity.  
Derangement.  
So many people think that I'm crazy.  
Utterly and totally mad.  
Maybe they're right.  
Maybe they're wrong.  
I guess we'll never know.  
Shrinks shy away from me.  
I've got too many issues.  
Kidnapped, adopted, tortured, disappeared.  
My whole life was a bunch of lies.  
Bobby Bowman, I am not.  
Mr. Lyle, no, still a facade.  
A Parker, perhaps.  
Oh, wait, another lie.  
A Raines. Ahhh...there we go.  
Yes, life is so much better knowing that the emphezema stricken doctor is  
my father.  
At least one thing hasn't changed.  
Miss Parker is my twin.  
Sometimes I wish I could make things up to her.  
I wish I could make her trust me.  
I'll never doubt that she's my sister.  
It has been tested and been told true.  
She despises me.  
I despise the life she had before I came.  
A mother for nine years, a father who loved her, friends who care for her.  
Still she plays the victim.  
Of course she's been lied to, who hasn't?  
And we've all lost things; relatives, pets, toys, thumbs.  
Deal with it. Move on with it. Life goes on.  
Of course, it always ends.  
Ends with a gun shot, a stab wound, a heart stopped beating.  
I've only known one person who can escape death.  
A pretender who can even pretend to be dead.  
Jarod, who craves to make life better.  
Newsflash for you, Boy Wonder:  
Life itself drives a person to neurosis.  
Especially mine.  
Lunacy.  
Dementia.  
Obsession.  
It's all relative. 


	2. Abilities

Author: Vona  
Title: Abilities. Part Three of Emotion series.  
Summary: Angelo's thoughts on being special.  
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, never will.  
Feedback: I adore feedback!  
Abilities  
  
Intelligence.  
Adeptness.  
Dexterity.  
I've always wanted to be a good boy.  
Ever since I was Timmy.  
I wanted Mommy and Daddy to think I was talented, a bright boy, a child  
prodigy.  
Then I was taken away.  
Mommy and Daddy were gone and Billy took their place.  
He put me in chairs and shocked me a lot.  
Then, I was what I always wanted to be.  
Except I wasn't.  
Dr. Billy didn't like me anymore.  
He wanted me to hide away and be ashamed.  
I couldn't ever really talk like I used to, but I always knew what he was  
feeling.  
I always knew what everyone was feeling or where they were or what they  
wanted to do.  
It was confusing and no one would explain it to me.  
I was totally abandoned.  
Then, I made secret friends.  
I've always been good at keep secrets from the Centre.  
Miss Parker and Jarod were nice to me.  
They liked to play with me.  
They weren't ashamed of me like Dr. Billy.  
But Jarod ran away.  
I'm glad for that.  
Miss Parker went away, too, and came back different.  
Both were always so sad.  
Now there is so much confusion.  
Amongst Miss Parker, and Broots, and Dr. Sydney.  
They try to do one thing when they really want to do another.  
And I, well, everyone thinks I'm dumb just because I can't say what I think  
all the time.  
I'm not.  
I try to help Jarod.  
He's my friend.  
I'm not always that helpful, though.  
I can't remember some things.  
Like what my mommy used to sing to me.  
Or what my daddy even looked like.  
In fact, I barely remember Timmy anymore.  
Timmy went away.  
You can't miss what you don't remember, so I sometimes think it's better  
this way.  
Oblivious to the way things in the outside are, yet painfully aware to the  
conditions.  
Unable to speak, yet having so much to say.  
Timmy always wanted to be special, have an ability that everyone loved.  
Timmy never got what he wanted.  
Instead, Timmy ended up being Angelo.  
Ingenuity.  
Proficiency.  
Powers.  
There's no time to miss Timmy, because after all, Angelo is unique. 


	3. Cowardice

Author: Vona Title: Cowardice Summary: Part Two of the Emotion series. Broots thoughts on life. Rating: G Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, never will.  
  
Cowardice  
  
Dread. Horror. Panic. Fear is something I'll never get used to. Searching for Jarod is an honor. Working for Miss Parker, not always a pleasure, but not so bad. Sydney, an amazing, although sometimes dark, doctor. Lyle, a man who actually can strike terror in my heart. Oh, if only people knew what I really did up at Blue Cove. I'm not a simple technition. How I wish I was! No, I'm trapped inside a world I don't even begin to fathom, a world I don't want to understand. I do as I'm told. I follow orders. Unfortunately for me, that includes breaking and entering into people's places that would shoot me without a second thought. I'd quit in a heartbeat, if I thought I could with my heart still beating. Or Debbie's. They'd kill her quicker than they'd kill me. My precious daughter would be used as an example to me. I find Jarod, then I can leave. But I don't want to. Jarod is out in the universe, helping humans. Humans that without him would have no one to fight for them. I don't think Miss Parker wants him back, either. Or Sydney. Each and every one of us is secretly rooting for the kind-hearted, deeply wronged genius. Of course we never say that. We'd be killed. We can't even admit it to each other. Life is frightening, particularly mine. Sometimes I wish I could trade it. But usually I don't. Like when Miss Parker, so angry and full of hurt, smiles at me briefly and thanks me for my help. Yes, it's rare, but it does happen. And when Sydney laughs at one of my pathetic attempts at humor. Or when Debbie comes home with an A paper that she achieved all on her own. Also when Jarod ducks out on another one of our sweeper teams, leaving only a red notebook behind. Nope, my life isn't always so hideous. Most of the time I don't even mind it. Except for those times when I think it's about to end. My life gone out like a computer that's just been hit with a virus. Revulsion. Aversion. Worry. Life is wonderful, except for that common emotion that pops up. 


	4. Regret

Author: Vona Title: Regret Summary: Sydney's thoughts on life. Part Four of Emotion series. Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, never will. Rating: G Feedback: I love it.  
Regret  
  
Lament. Bewail. Rue. My entire life is full of regret. Working at the Centre was probably one of the greatest mistakes of my life. I became what I always swore I would never be. A scientist who played with other people's emotions. I'm no better than the Nazis that killed my parents and took Jacob and I in for experimentation. I always try to fool myself into believing I didn't hurt Jarod. I look at him like he's my own son. But he's not. He has no wish to be. I kept him from his family and had him used for simulation. I try to pretend like I didn't know what I was doing. Obliviousness is a gift. But I did. Deep down I knew that working with Jarod was wrong. He was just a child. Just like Miss Parker was just a child. The little angel who had her mother ripped away from her and was left with an already distant father, or uncle, that is. I like to fancy myself a father to her, as well. I missed raising my own son, so I tried to raise them. Good job I did; a bitter, angry, distrustful woman and a confused, sad, fugitive man. I'd like so much to blame Raines or Mr. Parker or the Triumvirate. It was all their doing. They kept me in the dark about so many things. And I let them. I didn't want to know the truth. I wanted to bury my head in the sand like an ostrich. I try to make up for what I did. I want to help Jarod. I think he is gaining enough retribution for the both of us. I'm actually very proud of him. My surrogate son, I raised him to be man who helps people. Or perhaps he only does it out of guilt; guilt of what he did when he was only a child. He is not at fault. His life is not a mistake from above. Mine is. Grieve. Repent. Mourn. Regret goes much deeper in any man's heart. 


	5. Trust

Author: Vona Title: Trust Summary: Miss Parker's thoughts on life. Part Five of Emotion. Rating: G Feedback: I love it! Disclaimer: Never owned them, still don't.  
Trust  
  
Belief. Depend. Esteem. It's all so funny. An entire life of lies, an intricate web of deceit. Only child, no, twins, no, twins plus another brother. Father, no, uncle, wait, Uncle, then Father. Life is so confusing. Trust is a tricky thing. Everyone says don't trust Jarod. Chase him, it's the way life is meant to be. No, it's not. My life has never been the way it's supposed to be. My mother was murdered when I was a child, leaving me so painfully alone. The one person I believed in most was gone. I only had Jarod. Jarod left, rightfully so, he'd been used. I came back, back to Sydney, to Daddy, to Angelo. I'm not as heartless as I seem to be. I just have to pretend. Jarod taught me how. Jarod is wrong. We can't rewrite the story. Oh, how I wish I could. Then, I'd live happily ever after, with a Mama and a Daddy, and my two brothers who haven't been tormented into psychopathy. Maybe I'd even marry Jarod. But I don't entertain such thoughts. Life isn't a fairy tale, there never is a happily ever after. There's me. There's the four people I trust explicitly: Sydney, Broots, Angelo, and Ethan. And there's Jarod. Out on a rampage to save the world. Doesn't he know there are no super-heroes? There are no fairy princesses or damsels-in-distress. No, life is no storybook. Trust isn't easily given anymore. I'm cynical and slightly bitter. It's no wonder. Life drove me to this point; the point of confusion and distrust. And I'll stay here forever, never able to get away. Presumed. Indubitable. Faith. No, I'll never put my belief in anyone but myself. 


	6. Loneliness

SPECIAL NOTE! I'M CURRENTLY WRTING A CROSSOVER STORY BETWEEN PRETENDER AND ALIAS. I'M POSTING IT UNDER ALIAS, IT'S CALLED UNEXPLAINED. PLEASE DO POP BY AND READ IT. I'M LEAVING THE LINK  
  
Summary of that one: Jarod goes undercover at the CIA to find Miss Parker's new half-brother and to bring down Sloane. The Centre is the only branch of the Alliance left. Sydney and Jarod race to bring down the Rambaldi device and stop the Heptagon from taking place...  
  
Author: Vona Title: Loneliness Rating: G Summary: Jarod's thoughts on life and feelings. Part Six of Emotion series. Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own them. It hasn't changed.  
  
Loneliness  
  
Desolate. Forlorn. Lonesome. Life is such a lonely place to be. I was taken from my family as a child and surrounded by doctors and people, but I've always been alone. I can pretend to be anyone I want to be, but I can't pretend to have togetherness. I'm always moving from one place to another, changing my name, changing my identity. I can pretend to be anyone but me. I don't know who I am and that's a terrible feeling. Not knowing where your family is, not knowing who your friends are. I miss Sydney, too. He was like the father I didn't have. But I was never like his child. I was only his test subject, his prize project. Miss Parker was my escape, my freedom, my chance at love and life and everything good. But it all disappeared as she grew older and was told more lies. Her mother didn't kill herself, her mother wanted to help. Help me, help Angelo, and Kyle and Eddie and Alex and Ethan and Lyle and Miss Parker. She lost her faith in man-kind, so I lost her. I miss Angelo, his garbled sentences only wishing to guide us to where we should be. I miss my family, my brothers, my sister, my parents. I never knew them, except Ethan, and I don't even know where he is right now. I don't know if I'll ever find them. I may only find more lies and more traps. Or I may find the truths I've been looking for. I may find the salvation I've been praying for. I may find the forgiveness for all the wrongs I've committed. I'm alone and I think it'll forever be that way. I always wanted to believe I could change the story, change my destiny. I always believed I would get away from the Centre and right everything bad in the world. I still do believe in man, believe that beneath all the unneeded hate and crimes is a good race of people, a good reason for us all being on this Earth. I will continue to try to absolve my life and make living worthwhile. I will never stop searching for the truth and for happiness. Happiness that lies within family. Related family and my mismatched family; Sydney, Angelo, Broots, and most of all, Miss Parker. Withdrawn. Secluded. Solitary. I am surrounded by loneliness, but I will never stop helping people to fill that emptiness that is inside my heart. 


	7. Inferiority

Author: Vona Title: Inferiority Summary: Mr. Raines thoughts on life. Part Six of Emotions. Rating: G Disclaimer: Shocking news, still don't own them. Although, sometimes I do like to pretend:)  
  
Inferiority  
  
Subordinancy. Shortcoming. Inadequacy. My life has always been somewhat odd. Inferiority is something I've always had to battle with. Born and shipped off for adoption as if I never existed. I didn't always know that. I grew up the first fourteen years of my life as a perfectly normal Raines, though my older siblings always made fun of me for being sick. Then I found out. One day, a man came to visit my parents. It made Mother cry. He was only 20 and I was soon to discover it was my brother. I was adopted because of my sickliness. Perhaps that's why I became a doctor. I wanted to work with those who were stronger than me. I wanted to shape those who would make something with the world we lived in and make it work. I wanted to rid the world of weakness. Catherine Parker was weak. At first, she was wonderful. Her and her little curious daughter. But she was too kind, too caring. Just like her daughter. The world simply needed to be rid of her. She'd served her purpose. Just like my children are serving theirs. I am a father of two, an infuriated beautiful woman and a strongly opinionated man who reminds me so much of myself, only stronger. And my Ethan. My pet project. He worked better than Kyle or Angelo or any of the others. Ethan was perfection until Jarod had to tarnish him with that humanity of his. Jarod would be perfect if he wasn't so weak. I've always wished for a controlled environment, which is exactly what the Centre provides. I despise the life of the feeble. It's always been my goal to destroy it. Destroy the imperfect, destroy myself. It's all the same. Deficient. Underling. Secondary. Life is faultless, if we could only make the debilitated vanish. 


	8. Premonitory

Author: Vona Title: Premonitory Summary: Ethan's thoughts on life. Last in Emotions. Rating: G Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own them.  
  
Premonitory  
  
Foreboding. Ominous. Portent. Life has always seemed disconnected to me. There's what has been happening and the part that will happen. I'm special. I have a gift. At least that was what I was told. I had a family. It wasn't my real one. Dr. Raines killed them. As soon as I was in mourning for them, I was rejoicing for my new one. A sister and a brother. Sure, I was genetically engineered. Most people can't be special without some help. I don't regret my life. Either life. I do miss my mother. Sure, I hear her speaking to me all the time. I used to think that voice was evil, the visions a curse. They aren't. My mom wants to help me and help Miss Parker. So do I. I want to help Jarod, too. I'm torn between my siblings, for they can't stay together. No matter how much they wish they could. But he runs and she chases. It's the way they think it's supposed to be. But I know better. I'm prescient. It's my gift. Just like Jarod's a pretender and Miss Parker's got the sense and Angelo's an impath. They'll discover it soon. Whether I tell them or not. I may have clues to the future, but I'm not always right. If I were, I would have known about my real family and Dr. Raines' lies. Life is a wild, crazy bag of surprises and I shouldn't interfere. I'm merely human. Cautionary. Forewarning. Presentiment. I may know the way in the future, but I'm very lost in the present. 


End file.
